… if he/she had a sibling with special needs? It’s not a question that commonly occurs to parents-to-be but it can be if some scan indicated something… or if you were considering special needs adoption.
i started reading up everything i could about special needs when my son’s kindergarten teacher said he was having problems 10 weeks into being a kindergartener. Then came the doctor with blinders and then a second opinion with a more open-minded approach and we have been doing various therapies since. Now my son’s so-called “special needs” are absolutely mild… so mild i’m doubtful it will stick with him for life.
But that led me into the world of special needs and i started reading special needs blogs. ‘Flappiness Is‘ is one which i enjoy reading, she has such a way with words, such a great perspective… she wrote about When Siblings Have Special Needs. And i want to share with you my favourite lines from that post (brackets are mine):
Her kindness toward this child (a special needs child) awed me. I would have expected discomfort and reticence in a child her age. But my daughter, just a kindergartener, has already learned a valuable lesson that some won’t ever learn even in a full lifetime. The body is just a shell containing a person with wants and needs like every other. As human beings, our job is then to show an interest in all people and — if necessary — help them to access the same things in life that we all enjoy.
Now hold that thought; the one which says that the body is just a shell containing a person with wants and needs…
Now meet William and Tommy.
They are brothers and are orphans. They are both delayed developmentally. The old brother, William, has autism symptoms, mild thoracic scoliosis, strabismus, and the younger brother, Tommy, has congenital thalassemia.
BUT… when they were taken out of the orphanage and into foster families, they both responded well and are making progress. See what happens when someone takes the time to love on a special needs child? Can you imagine how wonderfully they would respond to a forever family?
Adoption is a call and not everyone is called to it. But you can still help, even if not called.
You can pray, pray for these brothers that their daily needs be met, that they continue to make good progress in therapy and life, and most important, that their forever family comes for them real soon.
You can also share their story with everyone you know so that through some connection, their forever family might find them.
You can also help that family reach them faster by reducing the very high costs of international adoption; you can contribute towards their currently very small adoption grant. Click on their names or pictures to go to their profile page to donate.
Thank you very much.
i leave you with another quote from Leigh Merryday of Flappiness Is:
No one wants their children to struggle in life anymore than is their due. Yet, these children continue in countless ways to bestow unexpected blessings. No, despite the good intentions of those claiming we are “special people” to whom God has given these children, we know we aren’t unique. It’s our children who change us for the better — along with every person whose lives they touch. Our children help to calibrate our moral compass by reminding us what it really means to be human.